Modern marriages and other relationships are becoming increasingly adventurous and short-lived. There are multiple choices available – be it as friends, platonic, being together in a live-in relationship or sexual preference within marriage or on the other side.

The social set-up seems to be very promiscuous. Is it happening because the young generation doesnʼt have patience? Relationships are to be nurtured and it does take time. But they need their ego boosters and self-gratification immediately in every sense.

Be it a man or a woman, sanctity is loosely based on the changed mindset and values which are many times attached to the enhancement at their professional and social status and it can be just for fun too.

There could be quite a few reasons for cheating on a partner:

Monotony: Before getting into a relationship, men and women have a fairy-tale picture in their minds which is broken the moment life gets into a normal routine. Roses and love fly out of the window and what is left may be the regular shopping bags and children (if any). Boredom enters life and you stop smiling till someone out of the blue asks you for something and stirs your ego or machismo. Then obviously your domestic life will not be the same again if you are not intelligent and sensible enough.

Curiosity kills the cat: Being curious without being cautious can create trouble. At times one feels like having fun in a different company as he or she may be just opposite to the present partner. The temptation of having the company of someone new or hardly known can alleviate the female and male egos and charm and lead you to great fun and greater problems too.

Changed scenario:  It is important to understand the changes occurring in a relationship or be ready for the consequence.

Sexual behaviour: There are cases when sexual preferences have been the reason for infidelity. Aggressive and non-aggressive displays of sexual inclinations can put off the other partner. So he or she may start looking for a change and cheat if the feelings are not conveyed to each other sensibly.

Opportunists: There are incidents when men and women have had a chance to be with someone without the knowledge of their partners. It is better to keep your observations sharp. Your partner may be an opportunist who likes to take advantage of the situation and be frivolous.

There could be a degree or two of difference between infidelity and an affair. Being in love seriously means having an affair which can alter your present domestic life and hurt your partner. Lust, an infatuation, may or may not affect the desired person, but if lust provokes you to take extreme steps in making sexual endeavors it affects you in two ways – i.e., family life is ruined and your relationship breaks.

According to a British survey eight per cent of men think that their libido will improve if they have sex with more people. Women have an uncanny sense of knowing that her partner/husband is cheating since they can notice the change in male behaviour. But women are capable of forgiving their cheating husbands or since they lay emphasis more on relationships than the act of intercourse. If things don’t improve, they will apply for divorce. But men cannot tolerate woman’s infidelity, cannot forgive and straight away go for divorce.

Life is a great teacher and every age has its own relevant biological clock ticking. The most dangerous age of illicit passion begins from the onset of puberty to the age of 40-50 for both sexes. If your  relationship has survived till the 40s in the modern scenario, it is either because you have lots of patience or there was a lack of opportunity or both partners are intelligent enough not to spoil their present relationship.

However, if an extramarital or illicit affair does happen, there are ways to tackle such a situation and repair the relationship damage: 

Improve intimacy: If a partner has betrayed and committed adultery, to stop it from happening again is to understand and know about each other. Mistakes are bound to happen, so better learn from them. If there is a breach of trust, move on to rectify work on your intimacy because love springs out of knowing each other well.

Fight or flight: The cheated party has options to go away from the unfaithful or ignore the infidelity. If the situation does not improve and the roving eye is back in action, then the relationship better be changed.

Communicate: If the cheating partner is to be forgiven, don’t forgive without talking and knowing the reason why it happened. The cause and effect has to take place whether it was an emotional reason or the sexually unfulfilled desire.

Declare or disguise: Partners in the relationship should be clear about their feelings. If one of them is having another intimate relationship, be upfront and own it and let the other party decide. But if there has been a one-night fling due to alcohol, suppressed erotic feelings or just for a change of personal routine sex, that person has to decide whether to own it or hide it. Self-analysis and strong determination can always help in not repeating the same mistake and carry on the present relationship or marriage sincerely.

Reclaim your space: It depends on both the partners in a relationship whether to continue or not if you have wronged and betrayed each other emotionally or sexually. Half-hearted relationships can cause only misery, so it is better to terminate the relationship, whether in marriage or otherwise, and have your own life back.