In the old days, the important things about school were the three R’s: Reading, ‘Riting and ‘Rithmatic.  Not grammatically correct, but easy to remember.  In relationships, it can be said that there are also three R’s: Respect, Recognition, Responsibility.  If you already have a committed relationship, we can assume that the initial building blocks of love and mutual attraction have already been set, and now we need to add the cement that will keep them intact.

Respect One Another

This first, most important tip will go a long way to keep your relationship lasting and healthy.  It encompasses so many of the critical aspects of close interaction that it seems amazing that it can be summed up so readily.  Have respect for your partner’s feelings; don’t say or do hurtful things that you will regret later. Have respect for your partner’s opinion; they have as much a right to theirs as you have to yours, so argue fairly and calmly.  Have respect for your partner’s time.  Don’t be late for dinner all the time, don’t hang out with friends more than him or her, don’t shirk household duties and expect them to get done by “someone else”.  Respect your partner’s other relationships; don’t bad mouth the in-laws, her best friends, or the step children.

Recognition

We all like to be valued and recognized for that value.  It is very important to tell your beloved that he is doing a good job with the kids, that you are so proud of her career, that she looks great in those jeans, that dinner was wonderful.  It takes such a small effort to recognize someone’s good qualities, or important achievements, and it means so much to the recipient, especially when it comes from someone important to him or her.  Studies have even shown that employees care more about being recognized at work than about receiving raises. Imagine how much more important it is that the one person most important in their lives recognizes them!

Responsibility

You are both responsible for this relationship.  Have fun in life and with your partner, but take your responsibilities seriously.  Nothing can ruin a relationship faster than one partner feeling taken advantage of.  You should both be pulling your own weight, and if, as it often does today, both partners have to work, then both partners have to take responsibility for the children.  If it is agreed that it is best if one stays home to care for children and the house, the other partner must take responsibility for cutting costs, recognizing the value of a stay at home mom or dad, helping out on both sides of the equation.  How perfect life would be if the husband with the long commute could start out with a hot breakfast each day, and the stay at home mom could dress up on a Friday night and become and adult once a week!  If each partner accepts the responsibility of the other’s happiness and comfort, it can happen.

Darren writes on many topics including technology, free people search, social media and social networks.